Rock of Gibraltar - mountain in background is Africa -bring on the tears ... our children are just across the waterI have had numerous random thoughts floating around in my head lately. I want to get them down so I can remember all that my Father is teaching me (and our family).
One of the things I love the most about our adoption journey so far - are the tears. I love that Craig and I both can cry about almost anything. All it takes is the starfish story (if you don't know what I am referring to, please leave me a comment and I will post it), a verse, a testimony, a prayer, a song, talking about ALL our children, praying for ALL our children, for goodness sake - we cried during the kids movie "The Spy Next Door". I love that God is breaking our hearts for the things that break His. I love that the tears flow easily, generously and freely and that Craig is not embarrassed by it but excited about it. It makes me smile to imagine the tears of joy that will flow the day we see the faces of our children when we get our referral and especially when we FINALLY hold our children.
We can't explain it, but God has beckoned our hearts to Ethiopia, we can't explain it but we feel called to siblings, and we can't explain it but we believe they are under 4 years old. The truth is siblings under 4 are not very common - this requires FAITH on my part. Faith that God is in control - faith that HE has called us to this very place in the journey - faith that HE has called us to this journey in the first place. Honestly? my first reaction was to arrange the pieces and 'fix' it. We could adopt a single baby and not wait, we could adopt non-related children and just do the extra paperwork (for sure sign of crazy thinking), we could ... we could .... then God gently reminded me that I may make the plans, but HE guides my steps and we must commit our plans to Him in order for those plans to succeed (paraphrased from Proverbs). I believe in the very depths of my heart that God has always known are children (our 4 here, our 1 in heaven and our children in Ethiopia), and HE is preparing our children, to join their forever family. I know that God is placing His hand on our children and will bring them to us and us to them when the time is perfect. "I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you." John 14:18. Sometimes I ask God what our children look like, I ask Him what their personalities are like, I ask Him to just give me a little hint WHEN I will get to see their sweet faces, I ask my Father all kinds of things about our kids .... and I can't wait for HIS answers.